Do You Schedule Time for YOU?
You’ve heard it many times before and you know that you need time to rejuvenate and rest, but have you done it?
Mom’s need “Me Time” no matter the circumstances they have at home. Everyone needs some time to themselves, but in this article I’m focusing on moms because that’s my area of “expertise”.
This is not just for SAHMs either. WAHM and working moms all need time to themselves. A time, DAILY, when they aren’t serving someone, wiping a bottom, preparing something or working for someone else. A mom needs those moments in her day and her week when she can be still and focus inward on who she is, where she is and what she needs.
For most us moms we can only find that time first thing in the morning by getting up before the kids, at the end of the day once everyone [fingers crossed] is finally in bed and have gotten out of bed for the last time, or for working moms it might be the car ride to or from work, but usually after we’ve already dropped the kids off at school or daycare.
What a Mom Needs
Peace, quiet, and stillness are what moms need. Maybe you are lucky enough to get glimpses of it throughout your day, but for most of us, that just doesn’t happen.
Have you ever had the opportunity to go to the grocery store or an appointment with no one else in the car?? I don’t even turn the radio on. It’s completely silent. Just me and my thoughts. It’s just a fleeting moment, but we take every bit we can.
One of my favorite things to do for me is get up before everyone else in the house. I can make my own tea without multi-tasking to make something else for someone else only to forget my water in the microwave or set my tea down somewhere and not find it until that evening.
Getting up before everyone else allows me to prepare for my day and collect my thoughts. It allows me to get a workout in and feel that I’ve accomplished something for myself before turning to the rest of the family for the duration of that day.
Some days you get up with the kids, do all the daily tasks of being a mother, feel so tired by the time they all go to bed that you crash yourself and you end your day feeling like you aren’t sure you even remembered to breathe. Good thing its an involuntary action!
Finding Time When You Don’t Have Time
Your days are filled with one task after another, putting out one fire after another, taking care of this owie and then that one, consoling your kids, breaking up fights, educating and socializing your kids, accomplishing your job, spending time with your husband, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, planning and making the meals and before you know it the days bleed into the weeks and then the summer is over and you feel that you are right back where you started.
It’s a good thing you take a few pictures along the way so you can remember what you’ve done with your family and see that your kids are growing so fast.
It can be so very difficult to find true, meaningful, quality Me Time in the midst of motherhood!
But we need it. We need Me Time just as much as we need a Mom Tribe to help support us through this phase of our life as moms. We must find moments to ourselves to even just breathe. To actually pay attention to our breathing so that our days do not just pass us by.
We are missing so many precious moments and opportunities if we don’t take time for ourselves so we can rejuvenate and physically care for our bodies. When we are tired, overwhelmed and worn out we can’t think straight. We get angry easily. We blow up and tend to act irrationally. These are not the memories we want our kids to have of their childhood.
Create the Life You Crave
How do we find Me Time in this midst of this chaotic stage of our life when little lives depend on us so much?
What if we can’t physically get away?
Is there truly a way to find Me Time without having to get away on some vacation for days or a week at a time? Although I’m all for that too!!
Is there a way to create Me Time without feeling guilty about spending money on ourselves or having to find a sitter?
Are you like me? A morning person who can wake up much earlier than your kids?
Are you a night owl and can stay up hours past your kids have crashed for the night?
Are you lucky enough to have kids who all nap for a decent amount of time in the afternoon or late morning?
Whatever time of the day you can find for yourself is what you HAVE to schedule for YOU.
Below are 10 simple, strategic ways you can create time to focus on you and only you.
Be intentional and schedule this time.
Turn off your phone and don’t succumb to making meal plans, cleaning up the house or anything else that would take your attention away from YOU.
#1 – Exercise
This is my favorite thing to do in my Me Time. As a morning person this works out very well because I can just get up, throw on workout clothes and head off to our workout area to be on my own. This is your chance to take care of you physically so you will feel better about yourself.
This is something you can do any time of the day depending on what works for you. I highly recommend fitting at least 15-30 minutes of exercise into your Me Time even if it is broken up throughout your day. It is important for physical health and also mental health. It will also decrease your chance for getting the flu or a cold by building up your immune system.
#2 – Read a Book
Reading a book can have so many benefits for you physically, emotionally, intellectually and spiritually. Pick a self-improvement book, a devotional, the Bible, a motivational story about someone you admire or fictional book just for fun reading. Spending even 20 minutes to an hour a day reading is highly beneficial to you and even makes you more intelligent because it increases your brain power.
Reading regularly is said to help with memory and brain function as you age by keeping your mind sharp.
#3 – Play Games or Color
Playing games like Sudoku, Crosswords, Word finds or similar are not just entertaining, but like reading it improves your intelligence, your brain power and even decreases the chance of mental disorders like dementia.
These can be fun to start and then when you have to stop you just put it down and if you find a few moments to sit down and get a few more done you can do that. Put one in your nightstand and one somewhere in your family room so that you can even catch a few moments of completing a puzzle while the kids play together.
Coloring….this has became very popular lately and can really be soothing! We sit our kids down to color and learn, but we forget that it is good for us too. Find an Adult Coloring Book at the store or look something up online and just print one page. Do what you can in the time you have to yourself, then put it away and pull out when you have Me Time moments here and there.
#4 – Enjoy Your Favorite Dessert
When you go grocery shopping pick yourself up some quick and easy snacks or desserts.
Hide them when you get home!
It’s okay, it’s for all of their benefit too! When you have a moment to yourself make your special treat and sit down somewhere comfortable and slowly enjoy it. You don’t have to rush through eating and you don’t have to share with anyone!
#5 – Spend Time in Prayer
I should do this more, but when I get time to myself I tend to forget to spend some quiet time in listening and praying to God. You will be surprised how much just 5 minutes in prayer can do for you. When we can be still and quiet, we can hear much more clearly from God and maybe start feeling like we have some direction in our life.
Just being in His presence and feeling His presence in our home is so comforting. Getting into the Word and asking God to be with us, guide us, protect us and show us His ways can help us to take a load off our shoulders and remind us that He is in control and we can let go.
#6 – Take a Shower or Bubble Bath
This is usually best done at the end of the night, but hey a mom’s gotta do what a mom’s gotta do!! The reason for it being done at the end of the night is that a bath is soothing and calming and can help you sleep better. So if you have a choice, choose the end of the day. But either way, if you can find some time to soak in a warm Epsom salt bath with some essential oils or just some bubbles, go for it!
Bring your dessert with you and some music and just enjoy the warmth of the bath and the scents of some essential oils.
#7 – Pamper Yourself
Whether you like to paint your nails, do your make-up, or do a facial or body scrub, you can use this down time to make yourself feel prettier. As moms we really don’t take care of ourselves like we should. We usually throw on the yoga pants and baggy t-shirt, maybe some face lotion or a little make-up to get rid of our dark circles and then that’s it. How many mornings have we even forgotten to do our own hair and then we are out and about and walk by a mirror. That was totally me one day when I took my kids to an appointment. We went through the entire appointment and then I walked by a window and saw my reflection….Yikes!! We just forget about ourselves so many times.
Taking care of ourselves and feeling pretty and well kept does wonders for our mental health and the intimacy we share with our husbands!
#8 – Write in a Journal
If you don’t already have a journal or write down your thoughts this is a great time to start! We have so many things going on in our heads. We have so many thoughts, feelings, worries, concerns and ideas. We need to write them down. Release them from our brain and declutter our minds so we can think more clearly and function better overall.
You’d be surprised how many ideas you might actually come up with to make your everyday life easier by just writing down all the things you have in your head.
Write out things you’d like to discuss with other people, but can’t because you just aren’t around people all the time. Talk through situations just you and your journal. Pray about it and see what clarity will come.
Make notes about your day. Things the kids did or said. Good memories, not so great moments and reflect back on things you wrote weeks and months ago. It can be quite entertaining!
#9 – Create a To-Do List
This isn’t normally something I would recommend because making a to-do list usually means you are thinking of all the things you need to do, BUT…..there are times this is necessary. If you find that making Me Time is difficult because you have a hard time focusing on just YOU with all the other worries and thoughts in your head then starting the time off with making a to-do list can be highly beneficial because it will relieve your mind and make you feel like you are more organized and prepared as you go into your Me Time.
#10 – Call a Friend (or Mom)
If you find yourself with a quiet moment and can give a friend, your mom or your sister a call…take advantage of it. Now, I know not everyone has a situation in their life where calling a family member or a friend is helpful, but you know your situation.
When I have some time without kids yelling or needing me in the background I usually call my mom. She is so wonderful about just listening to me, giving some advice here and there, but mostly listening to me go on and on about my day, my kids, my husband, my worries, my accomplishments and more. It is so relieving to tell someone all these things, kind of like writing them in a journal, but when you have a friend, a mom or sister that you can call and talk to it’s absolutely priceless!!
If you have a friend who you can do this with….of course it probably requires lining up naptimes or wake-up times together so you can chat, but this is where a Mom Tribe comes into your life and you benefit each other at the same time.
One of the moms of my Mom Tribe lives in my neighborhood. What an absolute blessing this is! When it’s still light early in the mornings we meet up and go walking before our kids wake up and husbands leave for work. It’s huge for us both to start our days off this way!
If you don’t know how to find a Mom Tribe or want to know more about what they are and why you need a Mom Tribe click one of the images below:
It’s Not Just For You
So, to wrap all of this up, you must find the time to spend on YOU. Just you. No one else. It benefits you, of course, but it also benefits your husband, your marriage, your kids and your home as a whole.
We take on so much every day and our bodies and minds can only take so much. We need to find time in our day, schedule it and focus on our body, our mind and our spirit.