Having a Mom Tribe is so incredibly important to our overall well-being as moms. Moms need support from one another. And we need that support from other women who understand the struggles and stresses of motherhood and are able to empathize with us! We don’t need a bunch of sympathy, we need empathy and a friend who will just listen and say
“I get you.”
“I’ve been there!”
What is a Mom Tribe?
A tribe is defined as a human social group. A Mom Tribe is also a human, although we don’t feel so human somedays, social group of women who may or may not have known each other before having children who make an effort to join together to help each other get through life as moms.
Your Mom Tribe can be online or in person. I highly encourage you to find a physically available Mom Tribe. The connections you make when you are able to be in each other’s presence are much stronger and more genuine when you aren’t behind a computer screen or smartphone.
Whether you are an introvert, an extrovert, a SAHM, a working mom, a young mom or an older mom…..
You NEED a mom tribe.
Your husband doesn’t get you like your Mom Tribe gets you and it is essential for our survival as moms to have our Mom Tribe.
There are so many opinions and judgements on how we raise our kids, keep our home and just do everyday life. It is getting more and more difficult to feel like you are doing anything right as a mom, as a wife and just as a woman in this world. We long for a core group of women, a mom friend that just gets you.
That one person that just gets you for who YOU are. You need….Your Person.
Moms need encouragement and support from the time we find out we are pregnant all the way through raising our children at home and beyond.
How do you find a Mom Tribe?
Read my Essential Guide to Finding Your Perfect Mom Tribe if you haven’t already and want to go out and find other mom groups that are already out there and looking for women just like you are.
If you live in a smaller town it may be more difficult to find a group of moms to connect with socially or the options are slim.
Or you may be on the other end of the spectrum and live in such a large city area that its hard to pick just one group and even those groups might not be what you were looking for.
Here are 6 Insanely Easy Steps to Starting
Your Own Mom Tribe
1. Define Your Vision
How large do you want this group?
Will this group be online or meet-up at a physical location?
What will the age range of moms be? Does age matter?
How often would you meet?
Do you want a group of moms that already know each other or will you have a few meetings where you invite anyone and everyone and just see who shows up?
How much time are you able to invest in this as the coordinator and point of contact for these moms? Will you ask other moms to help with anything?
Decide how you want this group to be formed initially, but also have an idea of what you want everyone to get out of this group so you can provide that information when advertising a meet-up or playdate.
2. Set Rules and Expectations
It is always a good idea to set rules and expectations for a group early. It helps you to maintain control of things going on amongst the members and within the events AND it helps the other moms in the group know this is a serious and intentional mom group that is there to protect them and encourage them along their mommying journey!
Some good ideas for Mom Group Rules might be to discuss confidentiality amongst the women in the group. You can also set rules about the kind of conversations and/or language that is allowed amongst the group especially in the presence of children. If you are a religious based group you should provide a Statement of Faith so everyone is aware.
Encourage moms to be uplifting and supportive of each other and not judgmental of another mom’s parenting decisions. Use words like
Encourage, Empower, Support, Love, Compassion, Grace, Forgiveness, No Gossiping, Helpful, Empathetic, Sympathetic AND….
Be A Good Listener!!
As moms, we don’t get much adult interaction so when we finally have another female, a mom, that just gets you its hard to not just take over the conversation. Be careful that you aren’t that mom that interrupts the other person before they finish a sentence because you have so much to say and add. We can be so guilty of that!
3. Choose Events and Activities
Before you send out invites or put up signs have a few events planned ahead of time. Plan one or two playdates and maybe even a Mom’s Night Out if that is within the vision of your group.
Make a list of activities you will want the group to do and then pick your top playdate ideas and one or two Mom Meet-up ideas. Read Mom Tribe Playdate Ideas if you need some help.
Think about how you want your playdates to be run. Do you want the kids to have stuff to do so moms can just visit with each other? Do you want activities where moms and kids are involved together?
Do you want to setup childcare and expect moms to pay for childcare so you aren’t dealing with the kids at all?
Or do you want to rotate moms watching the kids so no one has to spend any money?
What about a book club or sewing/knitting group?
Could you bring in guest speakers to talk on different women, mom, marriage or parenting topics?
4. Choose Location and Time
Do you want to meet in your home? Maybe have other moms offer up meeting in their homes too? At a local church? At a park? Do you want to change the location each time? If this is a social media group, like a FB Group do you want to have a FB Live setup at certain times?
Think about where it will be best to communicate with each other about future events or if something has to get cancelled. Maybe a place to communicate if one mom has sick kids or especially if you have sick kids and won’t be there.
5. Invite Moms
Where will you find moms to invite?
FB Groups, Church, MOPs Group, Signs at the local library, Children’s Museum, schools, daycares, local gym?
Remember, where you put up invites will determine the type of moms that will show up.
If you create a FB Group to connect with each other and make it easy for all moms to invite new members decide if you want this to be a Closed or a Secret Group.
A Closed Group means anyone can see the group, but they have to be invited to the group in order to see the conversations.
A Secret Group cannot be found by anyone searching for Mom Groups. New members will have to be invited in by current members or admins.
In a FB Group you can also decide if you want requesting members to answer a few questions before joining to be sure they are moms that will fit into your group and to also be sure random people aren’t trying to join. Once they answer these questions and submit to an admin, the admin (most likely you) can review the answers and decide if this mom is a good fit.
6. Encourage and Develop Your Mom Tribe
In your mom groups and meetings be sure to encourage moms to commit to attending as often as possible. This is how you create a strong knit group of moms.
If you have one or two moms showing up everytime and other moms who are rarely there it make it a struggle to connect well.
Another great advantage of a FB Group is to use it to post questions or funny stories throughout the week. This keeps all the moms engaged and connecting with one another even when you aren’t physically meeting together.
You can post polls, quizzes, jokes and more that will help you all to connect more outside of your physical meetings.
Starting your own Mom Tribe can be a lot of work, but it can also be incredibly rewarding for you and so many other moms. If your group grows and becomes too much work for just you, solicit help from other moms.
Break up the tasks and work into smaller chunks and you will find that moms are more willing to help.
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