What is a Mom Tribe?
A Mom Tribe is a group of very close mom friends. But you probably already knew that.
Why do I need a Mom Tribe?
Whether you are an introvert, an extrovert, a SAHM, a working mom, a young mom or an older mom…..you NEED a Mom Tribe. Your husband doesn’t get you like your Mom Tribe gets you. It is essential to our survival as a mom and a wife to have a Mom Tribe.
Husbands just won’t cut it, you need mom friends!
Our husbands don’t want to hear about our menstrual cycles, our moods and cramping, (although they have to deal with it), our hair falling out, everything that went on with the kids that day unless it’s happy and everything went perfectly (good luck with that!), or what so-and-so said about s0-and-so because he really doesn’t know who so-and-so is.
They don’t want to always hear about the 15,000 ideas and thoughts that ran through our head today.
Our husbands are amazing men. But, let’s be honest ladies, do you listen to everything your husband tells you about his day? What about the news story he was just reading and wants to tell you about it while you are cooking and trying to keep the toddler away from the hot stove while your preschooler is on the potty and needs to be wiped?
There are just some things better left to discuss with our Mom Tribe and better things left to be discussed with our husbands.
Mom Friends Make the Perfect Mom Tribe
Your Mom Tribe is your perfect mom group of other busy, overwhelmed, hard-working, well-intentioned moms that just get you! They know when to listen and know when to fix. It’s just something innate about your group of mom friends that developed into your Mom Tribe.
If you haven’t yet found your Mom Tribe then your mission starts now to find the perfect group of mom friends that become your Mom Tribe. To help you I’ve written a few other articles to help you find your Mom Tribe or start a Mom Tribe.
Mom Friends That “Get You”!
Your Mom Tribe is that group of mom friends that just “get you.”
They forgive you when you say too much while venting. They don’t hold anything against you and secrets are safe with them.
They encourage you and are REAL with you. That means when you need to hear something maybe you don’t want to hear they love you enough to show tough love and save you from yourself. They are there for you at 5:30am, 2pm or 11pm by phone, text or whatever another social media venue you are on together.
For introverts, finding a Mom Tribe is difficult because you don’t open up comfortably when you don’t know a person well. For extroverts, finding that perfect Mom Tribe is difficult because you can sometimes come across “too friendly” or “overwhelming”. Extroverts might say too much too soon and introverts come across as snotty or weak because they don’t say much at all.
Finding Mom Friends as an Introvert
If you are an introvert, you are not very comfortable opening up to someone you don’t know. You don’t just walk up to anyone and introduce yourself. So in order to get out there and meet other moms, you will have to step outside your comfort zone and make a concerted effort to meet some mom friends if you really want to find your Mom Tribe.
Finding Mom Friends as an Extrovert
If you are an extrovert you walk in a room and are ready to introduce yourself and ask all kinds of questions of every mom you meet. You thrive in group settings. This is a great characteristic to have when trying to meet new mom friends. You just have to be careful and aware of the other mom you are talking to. Pay attention to her social cues. Don’t back-off right away if she isn’t responding much or seems stand-offish.
Ask a few general and open-ended questions to help her feel a little more comfortable with you and make sure you don’t share too much, too quickly. Build this relationship slowly. Introverts and extroverts can gain so much from each other within a Mom Tribe!
You can download a FREE PDF with 15 Conversation Starters to use when meeting new mom friends.
It’s hard to know how to “meet” that mom that you hope might be a part of your Mom Tribe for the long haul. It’s almost like dating all over again.
You say Hi.
You ask a few questions, almost as if interviewing them, but knowing you are kind of being interviewed too.
Be Real. Be Genuine. Be You.
Adult friendships can be difficult to find especially when you are looking for mom friends with kids of similar ages and interests. Then compound that with today’s culture that is less likely to be physically present and more likely to be digitally present. You go to a park and you see moms sitting around scrolling through their phones more than watching their kids or looking around to meet other moms.
You have to be the change you want to see happen. Find a way to go over there and talk with those moms. Sometimes they just need a little push to have someone talk to them.
Start with a Compliment
One of the best ways to begin a conversation is to compliment a mom on the way her child was acting, on her hair, her clothing, anything about her or her kids. As moms, we need compliments! We are bombarded every day with how many things we are doing wrong and how many things we should do differently. Let’s encourage and support each other in what we are getting right.
We are getting more right than we think we are every day.
To find that perfect group of women that love you, heart and soul, and just “get you“, is absolutely priceless and will save your life!!
It is worth every acceptance and denial you might receive when trying to find your Mom Tribe. Just keep being you and before you know it you will have the core group of mom friends that you call your Tribe! They will stand by you forever!
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